I’ve been enjoying a slower pace of life recently. It started with a move away from social media. A declutter and cleanse from the noise that was saturating my life. A commitment to detach myself from comparison and instead focus on myself. My worthy self.
For me that meant days spent in Waterstones cafe playing around with pen, paper and fiction. It meant lazy mornings with a cup (or three) of coffee, my book and deliciously comfy and unbearably brash travel pants. It meant a week spent up in Essex, where I am now, to take some time away from the pressuring pace of home and find solace in the quiet and soft embrace of a quaint village. It meant days sprawled out in the sun, picnic blanket and endless tubs of fresh fruit, memories of endless summers transporting me to the last 20 months abroad.
I’ve allowed myself to take advantage of this limbo phase between finishing my travels and starting my new job. I’ve taught myself to give in to it, rather than to see it as a reason for anxiety.
I’m not that good at waiting, you see. Uncertainty, the world not being so black and white… it scares me a little.
And yet, the moment I took hold of that fear and twisted it into content, I began to find clarity.
Time alone with your thoughts does that to you, I guess.
I realised that my anger and defiance against the sordid social media storm came from its infuriating lack of purpose. With every scroll through my phone all I could see were cases of narcissism: people trying to so hard to be authentic they were almost becoming a parody of themselves. Personal brands begging for attention. Unhealthy lifestyles promoted as the “only” way to live. Anything else being “dirty”.
And I worried I was doing the same. Had I become so absorbed by the idea of being seen as a “blogger” that I was missing the point? The need to add value through your voice?
I couldn’t find my purpose amongst the chaos… something that was magnified by the empty hours as I closed up my freelancing and waited for my new career to officially commence.
Despite deciding to let go of the blog ever so slightly, I missed it. But I was tired of writing about myself and my feelings. That’s what my journal was for. And whilst I know that my blog has a purpose and has helped many people feel less alone in their own personal struggles, I wanted to take it a step further.
So I came back to social media. I accepted that it’s here to stay: pure and simple. But I also understood that amongst the negativity, there were those who were using their online voices for the better. They were using them to promote a movement away from trying to become an “insta-celebrity” and towards REAL authenticity. Towards happiness for happiness sake. Self-love. Self-belief.
I looked at people like Ruby, Rachel and Stephy (three of the most important women on social media) and the messages they were nurturing. Inspired by their dedication to using their talent and beautiful words to add positive energy to the online world, the answer was suddenly so obvious.
Because there is space to come together and acknowledge the tricks in society that force us to question our self worth. There is a need to work as a community to love our brave and beautiful selves.
There is a place where we can make our voices heard.
And that’s what I’m going to do… where this blog is going to go. I want to use my learnings on Yoga Philosophy, the perils of “clean eating” and “wellness” and the ever-present stigma of mental health to start my own dialogue. To join their movement and offer an alternative to the latest trends.
Let’s change our mindset. Welcome your power and fall into yourself. Your already perfect self.