Last night Cardiff was finally blessed with the arrival of all things Christmas-sy. Why, you might ask? Why has Christmas reared its fluffy head six glorious weeks early?
I’ll tell you for why. Because Step into Christmas arrived with a big, fat, glittery, ginger-smelling bang. AND NOW I AM THE HAPPIEST EVER ELF TO WALK THE PLANET.
I kinda love Christmas (can you tell?!). My inner child (lol jk, always act like a child) comes out in full force the second it’s socially acceptable to embrace the festive season. I constantly will be listening to Christmas albums and planning how I can beat last year’s gifts. I am a skipping, sparkling, singing bundle of festive joy.
I love the crisp, cold air, I love the tickling delight of mulled wine, I love all the shopping, I love the Starbucks lattes.
But most of all, I love the traditions.
Christmas tends to be slightly different in the Badger household. But that’s what I love about it. Every year we have a ton of guaranteed traditions that have just become common procedure now. And here’s ten of the best!
1. The Angel on top of the tree – aka, a toilet roll covered in tinfoil. When I was about 3, my sister and I made an angel for Papa bear to put on top of the tree. I couldn’t even use the scissors I was so young. It’s pretty much bog roll with cardboard wings stuck on and a few colourful star stickers. Unsurprisingly the years have been cruel to our dear Angel, who now hangs on by a mere thread. Yet still she perseveres and shows her smiling face every single year.
2. Gay Santa – as you can probably tell from the above, we’re not really into traditional decorations. Most are the epitome of tack; but Christmas ain’t Christmas without ’em. My personal fave is a china Santa who sits leaning coyly back with his big ol’ legs crossed in the sassiest ever way. I’m also a big fan of the Elvis decoration we sellotape to the ceiling every year.
3. Getting wasted with Papa B on Christmas Eve – a crate of cider and a bottle of vodka is how we like to spend our Christmas Eve. Although, sadly, we have been burned oh so much and now tend to keep the consumption to a minimum (for us, anyway). This tradition went pretty downhill one Christmas when we both got so drunk we slept through alarms and I vommed in the sink whilst brushing my teeth #stayclassyAmber
4. It ain’t a Badger Christmas unless someone is ill – whilst my sister takes the crown for this, we’ve all had a pretty good bash. In fact, last Christmas was spent with my head down the toilet and explosions from every single exit (hehe I’m so cute) before swiftly passing illness on to every fool in sight. A couple of years before that I was on crutches for the whole festive season. This year, WHO KNOWS!
5. Vodka for breakfast – the tastiest ever Christmases start with some form of delicious vodka that has sat in the freezer to make it super wonderful and gloopy topped up with ice cold cranberry juice. Start as you mean to go on, right?
6. The Strictly Come Dancing Game – without fail, every single year we will play this game. The rules are simple. You have to go through every single dance on Strictly and say what song you would perform it too. My Dad gets partic into this game and we honestly take it so bloody seriously. Personal fave? My Samba to Basement Jaxx Red Alert #tune
7. Pub Quiz – we’ve got a bunch of shitty old pub quiz DVDs that my Dad’s collected from the Daily Mail over the years (the only time that paper will ever be in our house). Every year we crack them out and get ridiculously competitive playing them. Some of my favourite memories are of playing it with my Nan as she time and time again would conveniently forget how to use the remote and cause a communal mental breakdown from all involved.
8. Staying in my jammies and Christmas jumper all day – i’m not one of those people who gets dressed and shit on Christmas day. No thank you Sir, who are you kidding?! It’s all about my flannel jammie bottoms and my food stained Christmas jumper, a top knot, and no makeup. Damn boyz, don’t all run at once!
9. NON STOP CHRISTMAS SONGS – we’re a family of singers (awful, awful voices, but we give it a good bash). Consequently we require 24 – 7 festive tunes blasting and me twirling around like an adorable little fairy.
10. At least one gift has to make someone cry – normally from me. I bladdy love a thoughtful gift, and make it my mission every year to cause at least one person substantial tears. The day isn’t complete until someone is reaching for the tissues. Plans currently in process for this year’s victim.
What about you? Does your family have any funny traditions?